Compulsion to Protect
by PetPetAngel
Summary: As though I did not know what else to say, I blurted out, “I'm here to protect you, aibou.” YY/Y Shounen-ai; Oneshot


**Compulsion to Protect**

**Written by:**

**PetPetAngel**

I don't know why I felt so compelled to protect you, but it's a feeling I've felt since I first saw you. You looked like me, but you were far different; innocent and small and weak.

I first saw you in a state of rest, but one might call it, more appropriately, a state of restlessness. I was at first taken aback by the similarities in our appearance; at first glance we seem so alike, but we are not.

Your eyes were closed to me and I saw not the purity in your soul; instead, I saw the dark purple bruise which marred your cheek. Your cheek was flushed with colour; but it seemed to me to be more like the colour of fever, not that of health.

I walked to your side; your head rested on the desk I see you so often sitting at these days, and my eyes trailed down your stick-like figure, seeing but not believing all the injuries you had; but my eyes froze at your hands. I gasped when I saw that, at your fingertips, laid the Sennen Puzzle, the very object that I had been trapped in for so long.

I thought to myself, _Is it possible that a boy who looked so young was the one to free me? _

I asked myself, but I knew the answer. I smiled at you, perhaps the first smile I'd smiled in ages for I had been trapped in the darkness for so long. But in that first moment, when I realized that we were spiritually connected, you lifted my heart from the abyss and brought it to light.

I looked around your small room. It was not particularly grand or spectacular, quaint, really, with a small bed and dresser, your desk. It was without a–what I later learned to be called–television, but on further inspection I found that this was so because you loved games. I loved them too.

I looked to the exit of your room, but when I approached the door, I found that I could not touch it. And that was when I realized that I was intangible; translucent, a ghost. The realization did not surprise me as much as I thought it should, but some part of me, somewhere in the back of my mind said that there was a reason for this, and that I should not complain.

Instead of trying to open the door myself, I walked through it. Despite the fact I knew it would work, I remember closing my eyes instinctively as though expecting an impact.

I looked around me to the narrow hallway I stood in. To my left was another two doors, but instead of exploring them, I moved down the stairwell before me. Beside me was a counter, and in front of me, a small couch for sitting on. An elderly man went about the room, switching the 'Come in, we're Open!' sign to 'Sorry, we're Closed!' while adjusting things on the various shelves in the store.

_Is this a game shop?_ I asked myself. As my eyes scanned the room, I knew the answer.

The elderly man turned around to face me. For a moment, he paused as his eyes passed over me, as though he could see me despite the fact that I was invisible to the human eye. He shook his head, dismissing whatever internal conflict he was having and moved to the stairs, passing through me.

As he walked up, he reached for the knob of his–grandson's?– door, the door which led to the room that you were in. He peeked his head in and I walked through the door to your room, and saw you in a similar position as before I left. Your grandfather walked over to you, shaking you gently awake.

I saw nothing but your eyes when they opened, and I was captivated by them. They shined with the wonder of a child; in the light, their colour was that of the richest amethyst. Your head rose and you looked around yourself with uncertainty, as though you didn't know where you were.

But I was not focused on your emotions, only on your eyes, which showed a purity I had never seen before. I think to this day that that was when the compulsion to protect you had been sparked, in that first second when your eyes met mine.

You stood groggily, stretching. Your sleeveless shirt rose up and I saw more bruises on your pale skin. Inside me, anger like nothing I had felt in ages erupted from within me. _Who would dare hurt you, sweet one?_

I was surprised at my own thoughts, but I didn't have time to think on my rage, as I saw you looking at me, shaking your head in confusion. Your grandfather looked at you in concern, his wise voice asking in a whisper, "Yuugi? Are you alright?"

Was that your name? Oh, the irony of the fact that your name was the very thing I loved so much, games! Was it a sign? It certainly seemed to be.

You shook your head again, still looking at me, and suddenly I realized that my presence was the cause of your unease. With that, I disappeared into my soul room, my heart pounding loudly in my own ears. _Is it your heart or my heart which beats so quickly, little one? _

I stood at the door to my soul room when I returned to the puzzle. I heard your grandfather's voice, as though from a distance, saying, "My boy, you've done it! Yuugi, you've finished the puzzle!"

I felt the puzzle being picked up, and I sensed your excitement from our link. That excited me; not that you had finished the puzzle, but that your emotions were clear to me, further confirming my suspicions that you were indeed my soul partner.

From the eye of the puzzle I saw your beaming face, and I thought that your smile was almost as beautiful as your dark lavender eyes. Maybe it was at this moment that the compulsion to protect you was sparked, as I thought that I wanted to see your smile as often as possible.

As if I was not pleased enough by all that I knew of you, I was even more thrilled when I first heard your voice, which trembled with the delight of finishing the puzzle. "Grandpa, do you have a chain–or a rope is fine too, that I can tie around it to wear?"

I heard your grandfather saying yes, and I heard his fading footsteps. Even your voice sounded like that of a child, but something told me that there was more to you than just the front of youth. There was something beyond your handsome–pretty, even–face.

Despite the fact I felt pleasure at the thought of our connection, it seemed weaker than it should have been. But when your grandfather came back and helped you tie a rope around the loop of the Sennen Puzzle, and I felt it come to rest against your tiny chest, I felt our bond strengthen, and suddenly all your thoughts came to me, almost overwhelming me with their happiness.

But veiled behind the happiness was a faint pain. A dull throb in your heart, the ache of loneliness. _Are you lonely like me, innocent one? _

As your thoughts flooded my mind, one thought stood out in particular.

_I wish for friends that I can always count on, who will never betray me_, came your quiet voice in my mind.

Even as I vowed to myself that I would become at least one of those friends, confusion plagued me. How could one so seemingly kind be friendless? That was when I promised myself to learn more about you, find out why you were alone in the world besides your games and your grandfather. Such meager comfort! Was there no one else there for you in your times of need?

"Time for bed, Yuugi," came your grandfather's voice.

I did not hear your response because I was so happy at the prospect of having more time to observe you without the fear of you acknowledging my presence. Inside the puzzle, I waited impatiently for you to climb into bed and fall asleep, but as I waited, a new question came to mind.

_If our souls are connected, can I see your soul room?_

Realizing I was still standing before the door to my soul room, I turned the knob on it hesitantly. Unlike before, when there had been only darkness at the exit of my soul room, now a narrow path to another room graced my vision.

I blinked in bewilderment at the bright light emanating from the room across the hall, whose door was wide open. Inside, I saw countless toys and games littered about the floor, a bed in the corner of the room.

I felt almost as though I was intruding as I stepped forward, entering the bright room. My breath caught as I saw you lying on the bed in the corner, curled into a ball, cocooned in blankets. The image was so serene, so calm that I felt taken aback by it. This was not my place to be; I felt wrong standing by you, as though I should not have been there. Then why must I feel so right at your side?

I walked over to the bed, stepping over the games scattered about the floor and sat on the–your–bed. Despite the pressure, you did not even stir, and I let out a sigh of relief.

I stared at you for several moments, drinking in your soft appearance, and subconsciously, my hand went out to stroke your face, as though I were entranced by the very sight of you–which, admittedly, I was. Perhaps anyone would look beautiful in comparison to the nothingness I had been surrounded by before, but there was a clumsy grace about you that I felt enchanted by.

You were unlike anything I had ever seen before, and the bright light which radiated from your soul room assured me that your front was not just that; that you were truly as pure as you seemed. I almost felt ashamed at the fact I had questioned it, but pushed the feeling aside, sure to mull on it later.

Suddenly, I craved to touch you in real life.

Appearing from within the puzzle, I stood once more in your room, but this time, the only light came from the moon outside your window. It caught my attention, yes, for it was very beautiful, the first moon I had seen in centuries, perhaps longer, but I thought that it paled in comparison to you.

I shook my head, somewhat surprised at my endearing thoughts of you. I thought of questioning them, why you had this kind of effect on me, and so soon after just meeting me, but I decided that that was for another time.

I knelt before you, staring at you intently, watching the rise and fall of your chest. Your breathing and restfulness calmed me and lifted what few remaining worries I had in my heart. I moved a stray lock of hair from your closed eyes, and my heart fluttered strangely in my chest once more when you smiled at me in your sleep.

I wanted to take your smile and engrave the image of it into my memory, so that it could assuage me whenever I needed comfort. _Blessed be Ra_, I thought, _who gave my unworthy soul the opportunity to know one so kind!_

My hand fell to your cheek. To my surprise, I could touch you, and your flesh was so warm! My fingertips tingled at the contact; I smiled widely to myself. In the moonlight you looked like an angel; you were my angel, how could I know any different? Despite your stature you were my hero and savior; you brought me from the darkness.

With one last smile, I thought it best to leave you to your sleep, and left.

**x-X-x-X-x**

Later that night, I found myself drawn once more to your soul room, craving to watch you once more. I had thought of simply reappearing from the puzzle, but the thought of further encountering your grandfather frightened me somewhat, as I clearly remembered his perplexed look as he gazed at my form.

And so I came again to your soul room, whose door was still open. I felt another smile already blossoming on my face at the very sight of you. I thought that, maybe, just maybe, the reason I needed to see you again was to assure myself that you were real, and that I was not alone.

I did not want to be alone again.

I walked over to your bed and found myself watching you breathe once more. Your breathing was deep and even, but I felt conflict at your injuries. In your small pajamas, the idea of just how tiny you were truly struck me for the first time.

_Do you not eat? Little one, what distresses you so that you have become so frail! Please, please eat, grow strong __for me!_ I couldn't help but beg of you silently, already knowing you would not answer my plea.

I thought that your heart must be strong for you to have such purity inside you, despite being older than I originally anticipated, but your physical state worried me.

Again, my hand reached out to caress your bruised cheek, but it fell to my side in an angry fist the longer I looked at you. I felt a growl rise in my throat.

I left your side momentarily to look at the toys in your room. Various plush dolls littered the area; one in particular, a magician in purple, struck me as something familiar, but I could not place why. As I looked at your soul room, I saw a darkness at the corners which threatened the light of your soul. There was something sad about it.

I glanced at the puzzles and games on the floor of your room, and I thought that they must all mean something. A checkers game went unfinished on a table in the corner; a jigsaw puzzle sat alone beside it. You were solving the puzzle from the corners in. _Smart boy._

A blanket peeked out from under the covers your bed. It was torn and tattered, patched and stained, but I thought it must have given you security since you slept with it. I went over to the game of the checkers and saw that you (or your opponent) were open to capture all the remaining pieces of the opposing side.

I lifted the red king up, but was left speechless as you tossed and turned in your sleep, finally resting to face me. I thought in that moment that perhaps my actions had disrupted something within you, and I felt apologetic. I put down the king in it's proper place.

I walked over to you and placed a hand on the side of your face, my thumb ghosting over your eyelids in a silent apology I did not have the strength to voice.

I jumped when your eyes fluttered open.

You looked around yourself in confusion, much like you had when you awoke previously, but I was frozen in place. Your eyes passed over me once, twice, before they rested on my form and acknowledged it. Your eyes widened and you backed away from me in fear.

I felt as though a rusted blade had been taken to my heart. Oh, little, what is that fear in your eyes? Do not fear me! I wished to say, but no sound came from my moving lips.

"W-Who are you?!" you asked me in alarm.

I opened my mouth as though I were going to speak again, but I was left speechless. As I thought on your question, I realized that I didn't know who I was; that even to me, my name and identity were enigmas.

Unlike most, you did not seem to be further feared by my silence, if anything, it seemed to give you confidence. You sat up straight, and cocked your head at me. I gave you a hesitant smile, as though I were trying to show you I was not a monster, but I knew what I was. No _normal_ creature could survive in the darkness for so long.

But despite my darkening thoughts, you did not pull away. You sat up on your knees and looked at me with wide eyes. Much calmer this time, you asked, "Who are you?"

I averted my eyes but trembled when I felt your hands–they were so soft!–on my cheeks, guiding my eyes to yours. I didn't know what was wrong with me, why was I acting this way? How uncharacteristic of me!

My weaknesses in that moment seemed so great, I felt ill just thinking of them. If you had not been so pure, I would've feared being taken advantage of, little one! But I knew you would not hurt me. Your voice, like a dream, reached my ears.

"What's wrong?"

As though I did not know what else to say, I blurted out, "I'm here to protect you, _aibou_."

The nickname came out of my mouth before I could stop it. But it was the truth! You were my soul partner; you completed me; you were my other half, and I would not deny it. You were the light to my dark; you gave me balance and steadfastness whereas I had lived in a world of chaos and disorder. I had nothing to be ashamed of; you were beautiful both inside and out.

Your confusion did not surprise me. We took a deep breath in unison, and laughed together nervously. You asked me with such perplexity in your features that I knew you did not take me seriously, "Am I dreaming?"

I could not answer you. As you looked at me with your large amethyst orbs, something inside me broke at the sight of your pain; you thought this was a joke! My resolve crumbled; not because I was hurt by your light-hearted attitude, but because you didn't seem to think you were worthy of being protected.

And maybe it was then that I knew I had to protect you.


End file.
